If you didn’t hear of the incident that occurred between Matthew Taronno and an OC Transpo bus driver this week, chances are you don’t listen to the news or go online very much.

Many expressed outrage at the driver, many wondered about what sort of behaviour would lead him to lash out at a passenger and tell him to “shut his cakehole.” In light of this, it’s easy to forget one important fact, Taronno confirmed he is “mildly autistic.” This is important because if it weren’t true, it can be argued none of it would have happened. That being said, this makes the driver’s reaction even more inappropriate. I know this, because I myself have a form of autism called Asperger’s syndrome, and am aware what can cause these situations of misunderstanding between those with autism and those without. As I’ve often had to deal with them myself.

What causes these situations to those with autism is that one of the facets that make the disorder unique is that people who have it often lack some basic social skills, including the ability to pick up on social cues that they may be acting inappropriately or disruptively. In this situation, the behaviour that Taronno was exhibiting was reading aloud a script he wrote for one of his Algonquin classes which contained some “colourful language.” Because of his autism, Taronno might not have picked up on any signs of disgust or anger the driver displayed before it was too late to salvage the situation when he went to talk to him.

I’m not wishing to argue whether or not Taronno’s act of reading aloud was appropriate, but I have a feeling if the driver truly knew the challenges autistics face (which in all fairness, he didn’t because he likely didn’t know Taronno was autistic) he would have told Taronno why his behaviour was inappropriate in a humane manner.

But the fact remains, the job of an OC Transpo bus driver is equally as much about customer service as it is about driving safely, and in this respect the driver failed miserably. I have experience with customer service myself through a previous job I had working at a movie theatre where I constantly had to interact with guests. I knew that if I swore at a customer, even one who was acting inappropriately, I would have failed to do my job to make them happy and to feel welcome and accepted there.

I also knew there were ways that I could deal with unruly customers, autistic or not, without having to result to swearing at them or putting them down in a way that ensured they’d never come back again.

The driver had ways he could have dealt with it too, he could have stopped the bus to find out what was going on and resolved the situation with Taronno, but instead he chose to vent his frustrations onto him like his feelings were the only ones that mattered. He didn’t need to know they were autistic to resolve things in a collected and calm manner, and to realize his job as a driver/service person isn’t to swear at passengers even when angry. What could have made things even tougher for this autistic passenger is that autistics can be very sensitive and tend to treat having their feelings hurt as depressing, especially given the fact that they knew that what led to it might have been a result of their disorder.

I know from my experiences with having autism, this makes you feel very unaccepted, angry and sad all at the same time. This is because I’ve encountered situations like this where I committed an inappropriate behaviour not knowing the consequences, yet had to face them and learn to move on from it in the right way.

The fact is though, that regardless of whether they are autistic or not, we always must treat other people with respect and dignity. No matter how they act towards us. The classic proverb “two wrongs don’t make a right” is as relevant today as when it was first coined.